No Pity. No Shame. No Silence.
In my case, I was raped repeatedly by my ex-husband. He was very well endowed, and very rough, and I suffered from a lot of bladder infections while I was married to him.
Subsequent experience has shown me that simply being well endowed is not enough to cause a bladder infection. It was the sheer, possessive violence of what he called "lovemaking" that caused me to have constant infections.
I learned a valuable lesson from that marriage. I changed what I found attractive in a man. As a result, I have two loving men in my life who would not harm me for the world, and a beautiful, outgoing daughter.