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No Pity, No Shame, No Silence.

I'm Margaret Alia. I'm a survivor of sexual violence.
No Pity. No Shame. No Silence.

In my case, I was raped repeatedly by my ex-husband. He was very well endowed, and very rough, and I suffered from a lot of bladder infections while I was married to him.

Subsequent experience has shown me that simply being well endowed is not enough to cause a bladder infection. It was the sheer, possessive violence of what he called "lovemaking" that caused me to have constant infections.

I learned a valuable lesson from that marriage. I changed what I found attractive in a man. As a result, I have two loving men in my life who would not harm me for the world, and a beautiful, outgoing daughter.

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
georgiamagnolia
Aug. 3rd, 2004 03:58 am (UTC)
Hooray Survivors! There are so many of us, and we so seldom know we are not alone.

Thank you for that link.
nematoddity
Aug. 3rd, 2004 04:00 am (UTC)
I get the feeling this is gonna go big.
zeliziw
Aug. 3rd, 2004 08:03 am (UTC)
No pity no shame no silence

I don't feel like posting my own survival stories here but I'm going to post the link in my own journal as well.

willowbear
Aug. 3rd, 2004 09:08 am (UTC)
support
I have no stories of my own to tell, I was not abused in that way. However, my mother was. She became a multiple personality because of it. She still suffers as she loves her family but there is also so much pain and hurt and anger. She and I talk about it though and that helps her a lot. I salute all you survivors and I hope you know you do not stand alone. There are many of us non-abused who stand with you all the way. Hilary
ferelwing
Aug. 3rd, 2004 09:15 am (UTC)
*hugs* Its a beautiful statement *snugs* I am glad to see we're not alone *hugs*
spina_di_rosa
Aug. 3rd, 2004 11:22 am (UTC)
Thank you for linking to that Alia, it has helped me a great deal.
dragon_smoke
Aug. 3rd, 2004 04:29 pm (UTC)
It took me a VERY long time before I even entertained the thought I may have been date raped. I am still not comfortable saying it out loud, because I still feel like I could have done something different. But I fully support this, in all its aspects.
mixincolors
Oct. 25th, 2004 05:57 am (UTC)
thank you
We all learn valuable lessons in life. Some of those lessons involve tragedy and others rejoicing for the lessons gathered. In my own journal I have pondered over my own life tragedy that involved sexual violence. For whatever reason the protective nature of my existence has not allowed me to acknowedge the entire scope of the experience so my pondering results in very disjointed expression from time to time. This intrusion, this violation, this lesson haunts me. I admire those of you and Margaret Alia for standing proud and giving me a tiny shread of hope that perhaps one day my story will come to the surface....be dealt with in my own way, allow me to move forward and to help others see that they too are not alone in their shame.
teal_cuttlefish
Oct. 25th, 2004 01:04 pm (UTC)
Re: thank you
I am glad my story could be of some help to you. That's why I tell my stories, so others won't feel so alone.
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )